


All The Wounds That Are Ever Gonna Scar Me

by ClydeWay



Category: My Chemical Romance, Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge - My Chemical Romance (Album)
Genre: Depression, F/M, Revenge Era, Suicide Attempt, drunk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-11
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-29 16:35:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16268126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClydeWay/pseuds/ClydeWay
Summary: The band and Mel are all over Frank's house, playing games when Frank suggests the wrong thing and leads to Mel having a suicide attempt flashback.





	All The Wounds That Are Ever Gonna Scar Me

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warnings For:  
> Depression  
> Suicide Attempt

Frank had invited us over for a little bit of a game night I guess, but the game he had come up for next wasn’t a good idea for someone like me or someone like Gerard but he was too drunk to care. Gerard wasn’t the only one drunk either, they all were, except for me. Frank had apparently bought a small cap gun at little novelty store somewhere in town, and he wanted to see if the thing even worked by playing the infamous suicide game; Russian Roulette. Although, the gun wasn’t actually real, and no one was dying tonight. I had tried to pass on the game, the start of a panic attack forming just from the name, although I hid it well from the others. I refused multiple times, but I couldn’t say “no” to a hyper, extremely happy, and extremely drunk, Gerard. He was happy, and even though it was artificial happiness from the alcohol, he had giggled more tonight than in the past month, and I loved it when he was this happy. So I said “alright” and swallowed the lump in my throat. He grabbed my hand, pulled me off the couch, and led me to a place in the circle amongst the boys; Ray, Frank, Mikey, and himself.  
“Alright, I’ll go first!” He pulled away one cap round from the circle of them like I had shown him years ago, and popped it into the revolver. He cocked it back into place and spun it a few times. He held it lightly against his temple and pulled the trigger. A small clicking noise occurred, but not the loud bang from the cap round. So the pistol went to Gerard. He positioned the barrel against his chin and pulled the trigger. Again, nothing but a “click” sound. So he passed it on to me. I grabbed it with a noticeably shakey hand, but apparently not noticeable enough for Gerard as he didn't say anything. So I raised the barrel to my temple. My hands started to shake violently, and tears started to pour from my eyes like two waterfalls. Memories of this happening before rushed into my mind. I was on the floor of my bedroom, a real pistol in the same position as I had the cap pistol now. The groove even still relatively fresh on my skin. I was crying my eyes out, but no sound came out of me. Gerard’s music played softly in the background of what would have been a suicide scene. But at the last second, moments before I pulled the trigger, Gerard kicked open the door, having gotten a frantic call from Mikey. He knelt down, threw the gun out of my hand, and cradled me until I fell asleep, exhausted from crying. Of course, drunk Gerard didn’t remember any of this when he first asked me to join the game. But now, the picture of me crying, shaking, hardly breathing, with the pistol still to my head, whether the pistol was real or not, struck him like a lightning bolt across the face. Memories of that day filled his head, and what would’ve happened if he had kicked down that door just 5 seconds later. The image of himself picking up my dead and lifeless body was one he really didn't like. The booze automatically left his system somehow, and he rushed over to my now very fragile form. He smacked the toy out of my hand and held me as if he might never again. The others sobered up too after they saw what was happening in front of them.  
“Mel...I-.I’m so sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” Frank said, I would forgive him, but just maybe not right now. Loud sobs came from my body after he spoke.  
“Hey, um, could you guys give us a minute?” Gerard asked, and even though he wasn’t talking to me, just the sound of his voice helped put me at ease. The others didn't even think twice before all rushing up from their seats on the floor and into the other room.  
“Baby…” The sobs continued, but much softer now. Gerard looked at my broken and fragile form and realized, this was his fault. He forced me to play the game.  
“I’m so sorry sugar. I didn’t even realize what was going on. It’s okay. Shh. It’s okay. It was just a toy this time, Baby. It wasn’t real. Shh.” He had pulled me into his lap by now, my head resting in the crook of his neck, and his arms wrapped around my form, stroking my hair with one hand and the other wrapped around my waist. I wasn’t sobbing as much now, but tears still fell freely. Mikey walked back into the room by himself, slowly so he didn't startle anyone. Gerard looked up and gave a stern look at first, but it left his face when he saw how worried and sorry Mikey looked. Mikey had been there the first time as well. I raised my head a little bit, just enough to see Mikey’s figure approaching.  
“Mikey…” I pushed off of Gerard a little and reached forward for the younger Way. He rushed over and knelt beside us. Gerard let go of me, not all the way though, as he still kept a hand on my back. I made small grabby hands towards Mikey and he moved forward to wrap his arms around me.  
“It’s okay Mel. We’re here. It’s okay.” He stroked my back as he spoke.  
“Thank you…” I whispered into his ear. He loosening his grip a little when I moved back towards Gerard. I placed my head on his chest in the direction of Mikey, and Gerard wrapped his arms around my lower waist.  
“Do you wanna go home, Mel?” Gerard asked, almost at a whisper.  
“No. No...Where’s Frank?” I looked at Mikey as I spoke.  
“He’s in the other room. You want me to go get him?” I nodded.  
“Okay. I’ll be right back.” He smiled before getting up from the floor and walking into the other room. He came back with a disheveled Frank next to him. He looked like he had been crying.  
“Mel! I'm so so so sorry! Are you okay?” Frank ran over to Gerard and me as soon as he saw us on the floor.  
“I'm fine Frank. Were you crying?” He smiled and nodded, wiping his face with his sleeve.  
“Yeah. God, I almost killed you! I'm so sorry.” More tears fell down his face as he spoke.  
“Frank, its okay. I promise I’m okay.” Everyone in the room gave off a small laugh at the unknown reference.  
“But really though, I'm okay.”  
“You sure?” Frank still didn’t believe me.  
“I’m sure Frank, really.”  
“Alright, you wanna play a different game maybe? Unless Gee wants to take you home.”  
“No!” You half yelled before Gerard could say anything. “I wanna stay. But not more drinks.” Frank chuckled and smiled.  
“Okay sweetheart.”


End file.
